Real Fantasy Football

I received an email last Sunday inviting me to join The Big Lead Fantasy Football League.  Oh boy, I hit the big time now.  I get to hang out with all the cool bloggers.   Actually I think they ran out of options and they came down to the slums to grab me. The jokes on them damn it! They have no idea who they have asked to play with.  Don’t they know that I own 3 Fantasy Baseball championships?!?   Damnit! This is football, you need no skill.  I could have my wife draft for me and I could still win, or I could do it myself and lose.  You have to be a complete moron to suck in fantasy football, or really unlucky.  I have um, only been unlucky. Yeah, that’s it.

Anyway, once I set my team up and checked out the roster and scoring settings, something caught my eye.  Two Quarterbacks. Now I know plenty of people that have played in leagues like this, but I have never.  My scouting had to change, and quickly.  I did not have as much time to plan for this strategy as other leagues I am playing in.  Now even, though the draft is a lot about where you pick and how lucky you get (or how stupid the guy in front of you is) this does change it a little bit. Here is the QB scoring:

Passing Yards (25 yards per point; 2 points at 300 yards; 5 points at 400 yards)
Passing Touchdowns (6)
Interceptions (-2)

Many points are to be earned by this position.  You have to get good QBs.  No waiting to the 7th or 8th round in this draft.

Now I am not about to go stat crazy with this breakdown. I’ll leave that to NickP.

CRMwillSmashYourHead (Cousins of Ron Mexico)

Our buddy CRM was screwed by the unlucky draw of the 10th pick.  Why do I call it being screwed? Because we were drafting in another league the same night and he drew the last pick (12th) in that league as well.  I have to say that he did a damn good job considering.  The Saints added Jeremy Shockey to their arsenal and this will only help Drew Brees return to his 2006 form.  Shockey draws attention from the safeties and this will allow his WR’s to go one on one with the corners.  It will also force LB’s into single coverage on Reggie Bush when he leaves the backfield for passing situations.  Aaron Rodgers may not put up the type of numbers Brett Favre did a year ago, but he will be serviceable.  The biggest strength is in the receiving corps.  TO will be TO, and Boldin wants a huge deal, expect big numbers from these guys.  Greg Jennings is the 2nd of 3 Packers on the team.  Can Ryan Grant duplicate his success from last year? I am not too sure.  Ronnie Brown and the Dolphins will struggle to get into the red zone, let alone the end zone.  This is a pretty decent team, the biggest issue will be weeks the 3 Packers are fighting for fantasy pts.

• QB Drew Brees
• QB Aaron Rodgers
• WR Terrell Owens
• WR Anquan Boldin
• RB Ryan Grant
• RB Ronnie Brown
• TE Heath Miller
• W/R Greg Jennings
• K Nate Kaeding
• DEF Dallas

SalisburyCellPhone (Joe Sports Fan)

Quite possibly the best QB combo in the league.  Like we stated earlier, the QB position matters so much in a league like this.  No matter how much Romo chokes in the postseason,  he is a great Fantasy QB.  Throws for a ton of yards and a whole bunch of TDs.  Favre does take a step back from the weapons he had in Green Bay, but you have to believe that his ability to get the ball to guys has just as much to do with their success as anything else. He does hold just about every passing record now.  Do not sleep on Torry Holt, he is the new Cris Carter (all he does is catch touchdowns).  I totally expect Marvin Harrison to return somewhat to his former self.  Marion Barber would seem to get the heavy load this year in Dallas.  He runs angry as a mofo.  Nobody seems to want that goal line more than him.  Edgerrin James can still get you pts, regardless of what you may think.  Thomas Jones had his moment in the sun while in Chicago.  He will disappoint.  Owen Daniels needs Andre Johnson to stay healthy to distract the safety on his side of the field.  Otherwise he is worthless.

• QB Tony Romo
• QB Brett Favre
• WR Torry Holt
• WR Marvin Harrison
• RB Marion Barber
• RB Edgerrin James
• TE Owen Daniels
• W/R Thomas Jones
• K Phil Dawson
• DEF Green Bay

Jews 4 Purple Jesus (Hef, Major League Jerk)

I look at this team and think, wow this team could be really really dominant. Then I look and say, or it could really tank.  Peyton Manning helps you stay in every match-up each week.  Along with Tom Brady, he is the closest thing to sure-fire production each week.  Roethlisberger has turned into a fantasy stud as well.  With a more wide open offense, he is almost near that elite group of fantasy QBs.  Can Chad Johnson be productive with his partially torn labrum?  Well, I sure hope so, since he will directly impact my team.  Dwayne Bowe was drafted in the 7th round. If you can grab your second WR in the 7th and it is Dwayne Bowe, this is what is called a value pick.  Nice job Hef.  If Marshawn Lynch can continue to get away from defenders as quickly as he does accidents, he should be able to shake a sophomore slump.  Jamal Lewis has a lot of mileage on him, but should still be productive in Cleveland.  However his success could be hindered in red zone by the Soldier, Kellen Winslow.  Or would that be “Soulja!”  He stayed at home with his pick of Neil Rackers at kicker. Rackers kicks a ton of FGs.

• QB Peyton Manning
• QB Ben Roethlisberger
• WR Chad Johnson
• WR Dwayne Bowe
• RB Marshawn Lynch
• RB Jamal Lewis
• TE Kellen Winslow
• W/R LenDale White
• K Neil Rackers
• DEF New England

Dave Lozo’s Tight End (Davelozo.com)

Ok, I love the Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning.  He’s my boy.  Fantasy stud he is not.  Vince Young? T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E.  Braylon Edwards is good.  Brian Westbrook is really good.  Jason Witten could end up being the best TE this season.  But in this league the QB position is way too important. Too bad it took Lozo until round 6 to figure that out.

• QB Eli Manning
• QB Vince Young
• WR Braylon Edwards
• WR Marques Colston
• RB Brian Westbrook
• RB Matt Forte
• TE Jason Witten
• W/R Wes Welker
• K Mason Crosby
• DEF Chicago

Strahan’s Angry Wife (Intern Bill-TBL)

Brady Quinn will be starting this year for the Cleveland Browns.  Derek Anderson will not be anywhere as good as last season.  His schedule is much more difficult, and he struggled against tougher competition.  Jay Cutler has all the tools, but Denver stinks.  Intern Bill obviously knows as much about QB’s in the NFL as he does about baseball.  Even the Intern couldn’t screw up his first pick though.  He grabbed Randy Moss.  Moss will not have as many TDs as he did last year, but will probably still lead the league anyway. Roy Williams?  He is good, but Calvin Johnson will be the man this year in Motown.  Marvin Harrison, Greg Jennings and Chris Chambers were all still available.  Frank Gore and Jacobs should help make up for the crap just discussed, but durability issues precede Jacobs.  Michael Turner is an unknown. He always performed well in the SD system, but with a rookie QB in Atlanta, most teams will be putting 8 in the box and daring the Falcons the throw the ball.  Shockey has always been the most talented TE in all of the NFL, but for some reason hasn’t had the numbers to back that up.  Well, he’s got a great QB and Sean Payton loves throwing to the TE.  Here is your chance to shut everyone up, Shockey.  This team is going to suck.

• QB Derek Anderson
• QB Jay Cutler
• WR Randy Moss
• WR Roy Williams
• RB Frank Gore
• RB Brandon Jacobs
• TE Jeremy Shockey
• W/R Michael Turner
• K Nick Folk
• DEF San Diego

T. Henry’s babymomma (SportsGal)

I have to hand it to SportsGal, she did a hell of job in this draft.  Wise move grabbing Tom Brady.  Let’s say he throws 15 less TDs than last year, he still will have 35.  That is only 1 less than Tony Romo threw all of last year.  What does that mean?  Brady is really really good.  I think you knew that.  See, in fantasy TD=Good.  Matt Schaub is suppose to be good.  Matt Schaub is SUPPOSE to be good.  I think you get my point.  Santonio Holmes really improved on his rookie season last year, and we see no reason why his production will not continue to go up.  With apologies to Hines Ward, he is the new #1 in Pittsburgh.  Chris Chambers?  Love this pick, love it.  Once he got out of the doldrums of Miami last year, he started to become more productive in the aggressive Chargers offense. Look for Chambers to really standout with a full year to play in this system.  Portis and McGahee?  They are as solid as solid gets when it comes to fantasy RBs.  We are not saying they are going to put up Marshall Faulk like numbers, but they will not hurt you if you have them plugged into your lineup.  Though look for Portis to catch more out of the backfield this season in the new Jim Zorn, west coast offense.  My favorite Chippewa looks like she will do quite well with this team.

• QB Tom Brady
• QB Matt Schaub
• WR Santonio Holmes
• WR Chris Chambers
• RB Clinton Portis
• RB Willis McGahee
• TE Dallas Clark
• W/R Earnest Graham
• K Stephen Gostkowski
• DEF Tennessee

Insomnia of the Soul (The Big Lead)

The Big Daddy.  While he was criticizing us for our selection of TE’s, he was busy selecting Philip Rivers and Kurt Warner as his QBs. BWAHAHAHAHA!  In a 2 QB league, you do not want Rivers as your top dog.  He is good for a more traditional league, but not here.  Kurt Warner may not be starting for the Cardinals (thanks Mort!).  Even if Warner does, he kills all the TDs he throws with all the INTs and fumbles he loses.  Not good chief.  Your receivers are top of the line. Fitzgerald will share the wealth with Boldin, and Calvin Johnson is about to go off like Mike Williams and Charles Rogers never did.  Adrian Peterson is the next great back, there will not be a let down.  Maroney could be an absolute stud if New England decides to run the ball more this season.  Nobody has a D-Line like the World Champion New York Football Giants, so we don’t see the Pats changing their offensive scheme.  Ah, Vernon Davis.  For two years I was bought into the hype of his running back type speed and hands of glue.  One problem, he plays in San Fransisco and his QB is a journeymen back up.  At first glance I thought this team might do really well, but now I am not sure.  If AP goes all 2006 LDT, it won’t matter that a backup QB is on this team.

• QB Philip Rivers
• QB Kurt Warner
• WR Larry Fitzgerald
• WR Calvin Johnson
• RB Adrian Peterson
• RB Laurence Maroney
• TE Vernon Davis
• W/R Willie Parker
• K Jeff Reed
• DEF Pittsburgh

Dark Helmets Helmets (The Sports Hernia Blog)

I am going to sound like Mel Kiper Jr here, “this team has incredible upside.”  Matt Hasselbeck is solid as a #1, Jake Delhomme is good enough to be a #1.  Andre Johnson may be the most physically gifted receiver in the NFL.  Brandon Marshall needs to mature and he will be great. LDT is going to shut up his critics.  Jones-Drew needs to take out Fred Taylors old ass knees.  Darren McFadden needs to be the rookie of the year.  Adam Vinatieri needs to not miss chip shots.  If all of this takes place, this team has champion written all over it.  Definitely the sleeper of the league.

• QB Matt Hasselbeck
• QB Jake Delhomme
• WR Andre Johnson
• WR Brandon Marshall
• RB LaDainian Tomlinson
• RB Maurice Jones-Drew
• TE Chris Cooley
• W/R Darren McFadden
• K Adam Vinatieri
• DEF Minnesota

War Pigs (The Big Deal)

Marc Bulger was my boy.  He always slipped through the cracks to me each draft I participated in.  Hopefully I didn’t give up on him too soon.  His turnovers have been up the last couple of years, and durability is an issue, but he can still light it up.  David Garrard?  He may not throw many INTs, but 18 TDs are not enough in fantasy to help a team win.  He plays on a team that likes to run.  They would like to throw, but the receivers suck or busy snorting cocaine.  This might be the team with the best collection of specialists.  Whosyomomma and Plax will continue to rack of the TDs, as will Antonion Gates and Joseph Addai.  If Larry Johnson can get any of his form back from just 2 years ago, he will be a great pick up.  Baltimore’s defense is not good anymore.  Not Good. Not Good.  They won the Super Bowl in dominating fashion 8 years ago.  They are not good anymore. Get it?

• QB Marc Bulger
• QB David Garrard
• WR T.J. Houshmandzadeh
• WR Plaxico Burress
• RB Joseph Addai
• RB Larry Johnson
• TE Antonio Gates
• W/R Hines Ward
• K Josh Scobee
• DEF Baltimore

Alaskan Fire Dragons (Sparty and Friends)

This team rocks. There is no doubt about it.  Why did I just waste the last couple hours doing all this garbage?  Champs fo-sho!  J/K.  Lee Evans up and down performances have me concerned. But he torched MSU his senior year and I have not let it go.  McNabb needs to stay healthy, do what he does, and Philly needs to lose.  Carson, you are as good if not better than any QB in the league, now play like it.  Steven Jackson, you got your contract, now earn it.  Reggie Bush, doesn’t it bother you that people think you are nothing but a bust?  Watch out for Cotchery people.  Seems like him and Favre have been developing some chemistry with one another.  Me likey that.  Even with the losses of Strahan to retirement and Osi to a knee injury, the Champs defense should still be sack happy and turnover producing machines.

• QB Carson Palmer
• QB Donovan McNabb
• WR Reggie Wayne
• WR Lee Evans
• RB Steven Jackson
• RB Reggie Bush
• TE Tony Gonzalez
• W/R Jerricho Cotchery
• K Shayne Graham
• DEF New York

Breaking down fantasy football teams is not a science.  This isn’t fantasy baseball where you can crunch the stats over and over and over and have a very successful team.  Baseball is won in the waiver wires and trades.  In football you may have 1 or 2 surprises come off waivers.  There are no minor league call ups that you can grab.  If your draft sucked, your season is gonna suck.  If one star on your team gets injured, you are pretty much done.

So with that said who is going to win this big time league, well here my preseason rankings

1. SalisburyCellPhone
2. Jews 4 Purple Jesus
3. War Pigs
4. Alaskan Fire Dragons
5. CRMwillSmashYourHead
6. T. Henry’s babymomma
7. Dark Helmets Helmets
8. Insomnia of the Soul
9. Dave Lozo’s Tight End
10. Strahan’s Angry Wife

Now don’t look into the rankings too much. This is only a 10 team league, so for the most part, what separates 1-8 is minimal.  9 and 10?  Well, what can we say.  Craptastic!

Are some of you wondering what Alaskan Fire Dragon is?

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